Comments on: Alone At Christmas – 10 Tips to Survive (and even enjoy) Being Alone At Christmas

By: janice

janice — Mon, 14 Dec 2009 22:07:24 +0000

Hi Maggie,

Great to hear your comments. I love what you say about events only have the meaning that you choose to attach to them.

Thank you for sharing with us.

By: Maggie James

Maggie James — Sun, 13 Dec 2009 09:57:36 +0000

Being a travelholic, I’ve spent many a Christmas on my own…except that I’ve only been on my own if I wanted to be. I love travelling and have often gone abroad at Christmas, and have always found other travellers to be with if I wanted company. There have been barbecues in Australia, huge meals in Turkey with snow falling outside, delicious Moroccan meals in Marrakesh….so many good memories. I’m lucky in being very independent and OK with my own company, though. I’d recommend a foreign trip to anyone who is worried about being on their own at Christmas.

There is a lot of peer pressure on us at Christmas to conform to the stereptypical image of evryone playing happy families around a log fire. For many people, that just doesn’t reflect reality. For those who choose a quiet Christmas or Christmas on their own, they can escape all that stress and pressure. Remember, events only have the meaning that you choose to attach to them. If you choose to see Christmas on your own as a positive thing, then it will be!

By: janice

janice — Sat, 05 Dec 2009 10:30:22 +0000

Hello again Heydave, and thank you for sharing your experience for us. Missing your kids and going through such raw sadness must have been hard. I think your point about giving up preconceived notions of “how it’s done” is very helpful. I wish someone had said that to me that at the time! I certainly learned a lot about myself from being on my own…how and where I was resilient or wasn’t, how I made decisions…where I needed to get my own personal act together, what to let go of. Lots of learning and being compassionate towards myself in the process. Sounds like you have been a beacon of hope to others.

By: Heydave

Heydave — Fri, 04 Dec 2009 18:10:59 +0000

The biggest hurdle I had to overcome when life changed and I had to spend the actual holidays alone was dealing with the raw sadness of missing my kids. But I learned that it all was only really a temporary twist of the calendar, and to give up preconceived notions of “how it’s done.” It was time to start new traditions.
Ironically, as I learned to get my own personal act together, I realized how many others were pondering my situation when their own worlds changed. Somehow, my overcoming gave me something to teach and help others.
It’s never a “fixed” personal attribute, then, but rather on ongoing learning process. And what hasn’t helped you learn, and grow, in the past needs to be replaced.

By: janice

janice — Thu, 03 Dec 2009 22:33:47 +0000

Hi Liz,

Good to hear your comments. This is it the beauty of spending Christmas on your own is that you can cook and eat what you want and have a wonderful stress free time.

By: Twitted by divamarketing

Twitted by divamarketing — Thu, 03 Dec 2009 22:24:28 +0000

[...] This post was Twitted by divamarketing [...]

By: Liz

Liz — Thu, 03 Dec 2009 22:20:39 +0000

Excellent article Janice.

Like you I made sure I had a couple of presents that I’d bought myself. I stocked up on veggie ready meals from M&S. I planned my television viewing and opened a bottle of wine.

I did have colleagues feeling sorry for me and inviting me round to theirs. However after the holidays I was the one that went back to work after having a fantastic stress free break.

Whatever you are doing for Christmas have a good one! xx